Sep
23
From the Department of Creative Press Releases
Posted by Clif Burns at 7:43 pm on September 23, 2010
Category: BIS
Regular readers of this blog are familiar with our occasional posts on press releases from companies boasting that they have “achieved” registration with the Directorate of Defense Trade Controls (“DDTC”) and that this means that they have been certified as being export geniuses in complete compliance with every provision of the International Traffic in Arms Regulations. The joke is, of course, that registration means no such thing anymore than an entry on LinkedIn means that the person will be a good employee.
Well, along that line, today’s post is on an exporter’s press release — but not one about DDTC registration. Rather, it’s one about an export classification decision by the Bureau of Industry and Security (“BIS”) which ruled that a telecommunications component was EAR99. Now you might think that this meant simply that the component could be exported without a license, but someone in the company’s executive offices was not happy to spend all that money on Washington lawyers without wringing some more out of the BIS decision:
“This is significant,” states Robert W. Phillips, President of StratoComm. “It validates StratoComm’s premise that the TTS is the telecommunications infrastructure solution for all developing countries of the world.”
It also means that the solution can be used to cure every known disease, end poverty, pick every winning race horse in advance, teach pigs to sing and get the Cubs to the World Series.
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Copyright © 2010 Clif Burns. All Rights Reserved.
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7 Comments:
..uh, the Cubs to the Series… that’s just over the top.
Wow! All I have to do is submit a CJ request and our company will be the significant solution all over the world? I’ll get right on that…
Keep pushing this “achieved†registration issue. Its a joke and should be exposed at every instance. Do you know if the DDTC has ever considered a real process for assessing organizations for compliance, i.e. in a pro-active way versus a directed audit?
Yeah, so, here is what I really want to know: Did the company come all up with all this, “ex-URBER-ation” all by themselves (or due to lack of understanding)? OR, was this press release and subsequent excitement (ie, false sense of success) generating by the ‘sales pitch’, glossy brochures, and ‘success’ first pumping — that came from the overpriced lawyer (or “consultant”) that charged them a bucket of money to basically, “fill out forms”.
Going to the BIS Annual update this year (…and mingling the crowd) here is the one thing I learned: There are WAY TOO many export consultants and lawyers out there making gobs of money on other ppls ignorance of simple processes. Good for them I guess, bad for me (working for fish-heads). I’m in the wrong line of work (right Church, just wrong pew).
[I just let this through moderation, without the payload URI of course, so you can see how stupid some of these comment spammers are. -Clif]
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Clif: Thanks for that!
If you ever hear a woozie floozie at a bar calling someone a “glob of delight, a diametrically tiptop surfboarder” then belly up and introduce yourself to Ms. Calandra – I’m certain that she’ll “unquestionably genuinely stock still reverberate and maybe Slap up extent towards yours!”
All your base are belong to Calandra. Make your time! “I will correct aside get!”
[Who says there isn’t any humor among us export controls geeks?]
The saddest part is that these companies treat “international” anything within their organizations as the proverbial “red-headed step-child”; staffed mostly with folks that have been kicked upstairs, because they’ve been with the shipping dept. so long, the company doesn’t know what else to do with them…
